there are like five rules to life and those rules are

1. eat 3 meals a day

2. always have a non alcoholic drink with you

3. never trust anything you think about your life after 8-9pm

4. do a little something for urself every day

5. interact with a Beast at least once a day (human, feline, canine, lizard, bird, etc)

and the secret 6th rule:

6. if you can't do all of those rules, just do the ones you can

Ntozake Shange, from For Colored Girls Who Have Considered Suicide When the Rainbow Is Enuf

[Text ID: “you were always inconsistent / doin somethin & then bein sorry / beatin my heart to death”]

“I want to fix him” “I want to make him worse” well I want to turn him into a flea, a harmless, little flea, and then put that flea in a box, and then put that box inside of another box, and then mail that box to myself, and when it arrives, smash it with a hammer

what the fuck is an open relationship. die for me or go fuck yourself

Shout out to the time my pastor responded to problems with the sound system with something along the lines of “The enemy is trying to mess with Christ’s message even now.” It has completely redefined how I deal with technical difficulties. Rather than get angry when the Internet goes off out of nowhere at work, I have to fight not to burst out laughing because all I can think is,

party rocking with a mouse tonight

piece of cheese we're gonna have a big bite 🧀🐁

and we gon’ make you lose your rinds

we just wanna see ya.......... . squeak that

every time i shower im like “yeah! i’ll take better care of myself!! this rules!!! yeah!!!!” and then the horrors

“The horrors” are “drying off” and “getting dressed”, btw

some of us were put on this earth to draw characters standing against a blank background 5000 times